Kinya Japanese Restaurant Review

Location:64A River Esplanade, Yarra's Edge VIC 3008 (Basically the other side of Docklands, it's off Lorimer Street, where the Citilink building is, right off the hectic freeway)
Phone:(03) 9646 2400
Time: 8.30pm (hungry hungry dinner)
Cuisine Type: Japanese
Price: A bit too pricey, I can get cheaper and better japanese sushi/sashimi and tempura elsewhere



What got dished out:
I took a friend of mine to this restaurant and we ordered 3 dishes that filled us up. Normally what I find with Japanese cuisine is that it's really difficult to get "full" on the food as the servings are relatively small. (which means you have to order lots of things.) The first thing that we ordered was Kani Cream Croquette ($12.50) which basically was mixed crab meat and potato croquette with some mayonanaise and japanese bbq sauce.
I had no idea what I was ordering, I mean i don't even know what Croquette are. But I ordered it anyway, I like taking chances (NOT), actually i was hoping for the best.

I was pleasantly surprised when it came out because the outside was battered quite nicely and the inside was nice and soft. It almost melted in my mouth, and every single bite was just pure awesomeness. Shame, however that there were only 3 and I had to share. The funny thing is, I couldn't taste any of the crab-ness. It was more of a potato taste then anything else.
I did however found the bbq sauce a tad too much, it was more salty than anything else.

Obviously it wouldn't be right going to a Japanese restaurant and not order any sushi or sashimi so we also got a plate of Sushi Sashimi Moriawase ($35)
Our initial reaction was " OMG that's so huge" but upon further inspection, there was more "props" then the real deal and really there wasn't that much sushi at all.
Don't get me wrong, I like prettiness served on a plate but when it means I have less food, I'm not entirely enthused.
To be honest with you the sushi stuff wasn't all THAT great, nothing to shout on the rooftops about. I can't say that it was of freshest of qualities or that it was riveting stuff. It was passable. Actually, my biggest complaint was that the rice didn't stick together very well or to the fish.
Okay I lie, that's not my only complaint, the wasabi was a bit on the weak side, as in I had to a LOT into my dish before i could feel the "kapow" in my mouth.

Obviously, this didn't feel us up (at all) and we had to order a 3rd dish which was the Tempura Moriawase ($15.50) which was an assortment of tempura stuff. We had the option of an entree size or a main size. We decided on getting the entree size which turned out to be the better option as by the time we took our last bite, we completely and utterly filled ourselves up.
It wasn't the best tempura dish I've ever eaten, in fact it was quite ordinary. The batter was nice but everything was undercooked. The zucchini and carrot (i think it was carrot) was a tad too hard. The prawn was nice and frankly if I wasn't so hungry, I wouldn't have bothered with the whole tempura thing. It was definitely not worth the $15.50.


My thoughts:
I was hugely disappointed with everything that came out minus the Kani Cream Croquette. I was quite embarassed because I had dragged a friend out to this restaurant, reminiscing about the good ol times that I had here (some 3 years ago). It was also due to this restaurant that I opened myself up to fish, my last memory of it was pretty awesome (some of my friends had taken me here trying to convince me that eating raw fish was the way to go, I was really hesitant at the time but thoroughly enjoyed it and haven't stopped since).

So nothing was worse when the food came out and I was like "wtf is all this? this is so ORDINARY?!?!!?" Perhaps its due to the fact that since Kinya, I've been to a bunch of dozen Japanese eateries (better ones I must admit), that I've come to have such high expectations of the food that Kinya no longer meets the requirements to my tastebuds? I'm not sure.

I have to add my friend did enjoy the food, much more than I did. One thing to Kinya's credit is that their staff are actually OKAY looking! Sure the food's average but the male staff make up for their shortfall. I know I'm terrible... but what else can I say?

We did have a funny moment, when we had ordered the Kani Creme Croquette, a dish came out and I was like "Omg that was so quick!" and then looked at it and thought "OMG is this it? it looks so damn small?!?!? I feel jibbed" Having no idea what the Croquette was, I almost freaked out. Turns out it was appetizers (which was on the house), and it was just normal potatoes (cold might I add) with some japanese bbq sauce. Don't worry it wasn't that great either. At least Kinya's consistent, consistent at making average tasting food.

To be honest, I probably wouldn't go back to Kinya again. It's not worth the trouble, it's in a really odd spot, it's off Lorimer street, where the apartment blocks are (you can see them off the King Street exit from the freeway). The only good thing about Kinya is it's location. At night time, it's got this romantic view of the Dockland pier... and there's less people. So if you want to take your other half and spend some quality time and don't mind average Japanese food, then Kinya is the place to go. (btw, sorry for the low quality photos, I took these on my blackberry )

Personally I wouldn't go back, for that type of money spent, I know half a dozen better places to go to.

La Porchetta Review

Location:273 Spring St, Reservoir, 3073, (there are numerous La Porchetta locations, as this is chain of successful Italian food)
Phone:(03) 9460 5525
Time: Dinner Time (around 7pmish)
Price: Reasonable (ranging from $7 for pasta and $17 for steak)
Cuisine Type: Italian

What got dished out:
I ordered a medium Porterhouse Steak with chips and mushroom sauce. I received a Well done steak. Like I've mentioned before in my previous post about how the standard of steak generally determines the quality of food.
I already know that the quality of food at La Porchetta isn't the best, it's the fast food of Italian food, kinda like McDonald's type thing.

I was actually kinda disappointed when the steak came out because generally La Porchetta don't exactly nuke my meat.
I couldn't be bothered sending it back because I was extremely hungry, and when one is extremely hungry, any food is good.

In haste, I forgot to request to have the mushroom sauce to be put in a container as a dipping sauce. When it came out, I wanted to kick myself. I HATE having any sauce on my steak. My reason? What happens if the sauce isn't nice? then I'm stuck eating it with my steak. Granted the mushroom sauce is pretty nice at La Porchetta, but it's not actually consistent.
I don't know if all the franchises have a set recipe, but clearly they don't. Sometimes it's runny, sometimes it's too buttery, and sometimes it taste nothing like the "standard" sauce.
The mushroom sauce I had that day was a tad on the runny side(too much water I think?).

The chips weren't that bad, but of course nothing beats McDonald's fries, but these suffice, at least the chips weren't so brown due to the lack of oil change.

The meal was edible and I completed the whole entire thing without having to think twice. I can't say it's the best steak I've had, but it wasn't the worst. In truth, it was the poorest La Porchetta steak I've had in a while. But who can complain? the steak is only $17 bucks, a lot cheaper than most places (by almost $10), so I don't have high expectations of it.

I did try a little bit of my friend's ravioli bolognaise. I think this has to be such a weird combination. Of course I always associate bolognaise with spaghetti and then whenever other pasta types are used, I just get weirded out. La Porchetta doesn't make a flashy sauce, nothing punchy about it. I mean I've been to a place where the sauce was really sour-ish due to the fresh tomatos. In truth La Porchetta is a safe house. I mean the sauce taste no different to ones that you get from a Dolmio's bottle. I didn't mind the combination. The pasta wasn't hard rock, I've tried in some places where the ravioli tasted like OMG WTF that with each bite I wanted to cry. There were no tears here.

My thoughts:
I've been going to La Porchetta for years, even in my uni days, because it's quick, easy and cheap, especially for some Italian food. It's not fine dining but it's a lot better than the stuff that you buy from the bamborines from shopping centres. I can live with cheap and okay food. I can't deal with expensive food for mediocre servings and mediocre tastings which La Porchetta is not.
It's probably one of the more famous chains in Melbourne for Italian food, the other being Sofia's but they do extremely large servings that could feed a family of four on one pasta dish. I find places like that food wastage.
I guess I like coming here because it is safe and easy. Stuff I should learn to make myself but can't be bothered because someone else makes it quicker (not better).
It's probably the reason why even years on, the La Porchetta chain is still very successful, there are a LOT of these chains lurking around Melbourne, it's some pretty crazy stuff and most people have the same mentality as myself (ahh the lazyness)...

And in truth, when it comes to Italian food, I use La Porchetta as the benchmark (you have to start somewhere), I generally crack it if the steak/pasta/chicken/pizza comes to me worst off than La Porchetta's and cost more. Generally you get a face palm type thing going from myself. and I'm mad as hell. =]

I know everybody has a benchmark for food, I mean you have to, how else do you know if something is good or bad? Unfortunately for me, when it comes to Vietnamese food, the standard is high because the benchmark happens to be my mother's cooking. When it comes to Italian, it's surely La Porchetta. Don't ask me why, it's just how it is.

Supper Inn Review

Location:15 Celestial Av, Melbourne (it's off in an alleyway off Little Bourke Street, and you're going to have to hike up a set of stairs and generally have to wait to get a table)
Phone: (03) 9663 4759
Time: around 10pm (they're open for dinner only from 5.30pm until about 2.30am)
Price: Reasonable (bowls of congee is approx $7, but it feels you up)
Cuisine Type: Chinese

What got dished out:
I only ever go here for one thing and one thing only and that is congee. I have to say I have tried lots of other places in and around the city to get congee (only because I couldn't be bothered waiting around for a seat at Supper Inn) only to be disappointed. Supper Inn is in fact an institution having been around for years and years. It's probably one of the best places around for late night supper. I wouldn't recommend it for anything else other than congee. Seriously if you're there for Chinese cuisine, Supper Inn does an average job at it, you can get better elsewhere.

To be honest, I am not an avid fan of having so much ginger in my congee, only because I really dislike ginger. It reminds me of my childhood of being forced to eat ginger whenever I had a cold. However, only at Supper Inn would I ever overlook the whole excess ginger factor and eat it, (instead of the usual: pick- yucky stuff out- of bowl method).

My usual pick is generally the chicken congee because I only ever play it safe. (i know I'm so boring), once I ventured out and picked the chicken congee with abalone. A lot of my friends have tried "fish" congee and "century egg" congee. Unfortunately I'm not that much of a huge fan of fish and I really can't eat egg that looks like the same colour as off-meat.
The congee itself is light and easy to eat. I hate it when congee is too salty or too thick because it makes the whole experience so bleh, not only that congee isn't the only thing I order.

I once had some cousins come down from Sydney who had ordered Pippies in XO sauce and got me hooked on it. I've ALWAYS had congee from Supper Inn with their Pippies, mainly because they make it sooo damn nice.
One of my biggest complaints about the pippies generally is that they're really small. They generally look under grown stuff, stuff you buy from the blackmarket type thing. If they're not small then the servings are generally too small(the kind you get when you fine dine). Seriously at one stage, I was starting to think that Supper Inn were short changing us because each time I went there on 3 consecutive weeks, the servings got smaller and smaller and smaller...
On this occasion, they really did surprise us because the pippies were huge, like on steroids huge. The sauce obviously magnificient, normally I put a spoonful of the sauce into my bowl of congee (hence why I love the fact that their congee isn't so overpowering in taste as if it were, you wouldn't be able to mix it, yet you could eat it without adding anything else).
Of course eating congee without chinese donuts is kinda wrong. So we always order a dish of this. Now if you're here for the fresh kind, then you're going to be disappointed. I mean seriously this is a restaurant not a bakery, and you're here for dinner not breakfast. Personally I'm not really fussed, I only order them because they're great with the Pippies. I leave them to be drenched by the XO sauce and then add them to my congee. Most times I just eat them without putting it in the congee.

Seriously these are the only 3 dishes that I ever order, I have a friend who orders peking duck (wrong place to get them) or oysters etc. But like I said, Supper Inn is only known for it's congee and things to be eaten with congee.
The prices are somewhat reasonable. From memory the bowl of congee is like $7 bucks, it's quite reasonable as it's an average size bowl and can easily fill you up. The pippies is about $15ish and the chinese donuts are like $2.50. I can't remember the actual prices, maybe next time when I go, I'll update it.
I'm terrible with pricing, mainly because there's no real need to remember it after days since you've eaten there. *sheesh*


My thoughts:

I've been going to Supper Inn for years, I can't remember who introduced me to the place but it's the one place that even at 10pm on a Wednesday night, I'd be more than happy to get changed out of my pj's just for some congee, especially on a wintry Melbourne night. Don't be surprised to go there and having to find yourself lining up for ages just to get a table. Generally you have to wait along the staircase, and then have to subject yourself to diners who have already eaten make comments of how awesome it is, whilst you're extremely hungry and having the need to pass out because you need food NOW (yes that's happen to me a few times), of course those types of comments don't make the wait any better.
They have a downstairs and an upstairs, but for some reason I've found the food upstairs to be a little bit better, the menu's the same and I'm sure it comes out of the same kitchen but the quality is a tad different. I don't know, I still can't put my finger on it yet. Maybe one day I'll have it all worked out.

The other thing... if you go to Supper Inn expecting some kind of decent service, then obviously you're going to the wrong place. You're not paying for service, granted they don't bark at you but they can sometimes borderline as rude. These guys are quick to give you the bill, understandably they've got people lining up wanting a seat so the quicker they get you to eat, the quicker they can get you to get out.
I once remember commenting on how none of the staff really smile, they all look so serious, it's kinda like they're all heading to a funeral and someone forgot to tell you. I also remember another time when these same waiters tried to smile, it was so forceful that I actually preferred the serious look.

Oh... and the decor... let me tell you, in the years that I've gone (almost 10 years now I think), literally NOTHING has changed. It's kinda like the owners got so self absorbed at being so popular and producing good food (okay just the congee) that they thought "change the furniture? what the hell for" =]
The place looks hella tired, while most places look lavish with nicer tables and chairs and awesome things to look at whilst you eat, at Supper Inn tired looking furniture and decor is where it's at. I mean the staff match the decor and frankly why change? especially when the whole thing works so well.

One thing I've noticed over the years... is that when it comes to the bill, the waiters always give you a whole BUNCH of change, I guess in hopes that you'd leave all the poo change for tips. I know... so blardy DODGY!
Now let's be frank about this, we don't live in America. Tipping is not compulsory, therefore tipping would only occur when exceptional customer service is given, however seeing that these guys wouldn't even know the first thing about customer service, come on, it would almost kill someone for a smile, I sure ain't tipping.
Yes I know they come take my order, and bring out the food, but that's what waiters are paid to do. I'm not going to "pay" someone extra for them just doing their job, that's what employers do. Tipping should be thanking them for going above and beyond. Of course not everybody sees it this way but that's just my view point.

I know one things for sure, even with or without the customer service, and old decor, the foods great. It's consisent and has been for 10 years+. I know I'd still be going back and if you live in Melbourne and haven't been... you really need to crawl out of your rock and try the damn place out. You seriously don't know what on Earth you're missing out on

Happy Days Review

Location: Highpoint Shopping Centre (Rosamond Rd), Downstairs near the cinemas
Phone: 9317 3990
Time: 8.30pm ( I was there for dinner)
Price: Unreasonable( I paid approx $29 for steak and hated it)
Cuisine Type: Cafe food




What got dished out:
Whenever I go to a cafe type place for some odd reason I always order the steak.I guess because for me, the steak tells me so much about a place. I.E the quality of their food. If the steak is cooked properly then I know that the standard is pretty good with everything else and that I'd be returning to try everything else. Of course, cook the steak incorrectly and it's game over.
This was supposed to be the Eye Fillet with chips and Vegies with Mushroom sauce.
I always request for a medium steak, most times it's a hit and miss. I mean what's the point in anyone asking, it should be like "you get what the chef feels like" because I've asked for medium and it either comes out nuked (i think thats supposed to be "well done" or it comes out rare with blood squirting me in the eye with each cut.
The chef/cook got it right, it was indeed medium. It was indeed steak tasting, but my biggest issue was the plate being too small. I mean they dumped the piece of steak on a bed of chips and veggies. Where exactly did they think I was going to cut up my steak? On my lap perhaps? My friend of course was like "you can cut it on top of the chips", true but then I'd be squashing my chips.
The chips by the way weren't that flash, more like cooked in oil that hasn't been changed for ages.
Now I'm no salad fan. I don't unfortunately eat my vegetables as I'm supposed to. And the salad that they lumped on my plate didn't look all that appetizing either. It looked like a day or two old and i wasn't going to bother with it.
This is pretty much the end result. I didn't touch much of the chips, I wasn't going to attempt any of the salad and frankly the steak was just too bleh to go any further. I might as well add here that I also had an issue with their mushroom sauce which tasted nothing like mushroom sauce. In fact it tasted like something that I'd get from a gravax tin, add water, cut up some mushrooms and claim it to be mushroom sauce. Oh wow, I think I just worked out their secret. LOL.
The sauce was really watery and bland, actually it just tasted like packet sauce to me, it was the most disappointing steak I've had in a while, not the worst steak but was pretty up there in terrible steaks and I know I've had better somewhere else... Actually, i think I could have cooked up something better and I am no cook, in fact I think there is a law somewhere where it's illegal for me to cook =].

My friend ordered some veggie burger. I can't remember the actual name of it. But when it came out, the first thing she said was "Gee the bread sure does look waxy". Being that I didn't bother taking a bite out of her veggie burger, as I'm no big fan of "veggie patties", I thought I'd give it a miss.
My friend being the actual vegetarian commented that it was one hell of a burger, as in it was pretty decent. I'd take her word for it, I'm not one to go to any cafe/restaurant/take-away place that serves meat and order vegetarian of anything. I like my meat dishes a bit toooo much. But she did rub it in a little bit (probably without realising it) that her meal was awesome (yes she did find the chips a bit soggy and also believed that the oil was old),and she was apparently fine with the salad. The damn girl ate the whole thing and left nothing on her plate.

My thoughts:
When it comes to shopping centres, I totally believe in just sticking to the fast food joints. Nothing ever really comes good out of a shopping centre especially when it comes to dining. I prefer places like McDonalds, KFC or better yet Nandos over something like Happy Days. Fast food outlets are consistent on making bad unhealthy food but the standard is the same no matter where you go. LOL.

Right where Happy Days is situated there is a Nandos, a La Porchetta, Seared, Grilled and China Bar. It puzzles me on how such a place that serves mediocre food can still exist. Yes it's got that 1960's feel about it, as in there's a juke box in the background. It's quirky but that's as far as it goes. Diners go to a place to eat. you get wow`ed at the scenery for like 5 minutes, get bored and expect good food. Which clearly they really struggle. Okay fine, I only had the steak but like I said, the steak is always an indication on how a place is travelling.

Happy Days has some stiff competition considering La Porchetta does something very similar for a lot less and are consistent at making their food taste a certain way. Which I guess also explains why La Porchetta is bigger and busier.
Who in their right mind go to Happy Days? Those who couldn't find a seat at La Porchetta or Seared. Can't be bothered with Grilled or Pancake Parlour. OR they think "we walk past Happy days all the time, let's give it a try"

Would I go back? hell NO! Especially considering there are so many OTHER better options around it, that I'd rather eat there. Happy Days should be called "Struggling Days". Because I struggle to comprehend why they're still there and who the hell would even bother going there.

Stokers Coffee Lounge Review

Location: 1033 Heidelberg Road,Ivanhoe
Phone: (03) 9497 4488
(note: it's really easy to almost miss it as this place is only open at night, i think from 6pm (weekdays and 8pm weekend ), park next door at the empty car-park.. btw it's gravel.. which means if you have a lowered sports car, it's not the best idea)

Time: I always go late at night, anywhere between 10pm-1am. I think they close at 2am, Ring to check.

Price: Reasonable if you're there for drinks as most places don't charge you an arm and a leg... the crepes/pancakes are like $7 bucks. Sorry, I've never ever checked the individual pricing. (i told you i make a terrible reviewer)

Payment type: Cash only (Note; I know, what a pain in the butt because lots of people don't carry cash, but look at it this way, to keep costs low, cash is better for a lot of small businesses as Eftpos facilities cost money, and this is factored into the cost of food... )

Cuisine Type: Dessert


What Got dished out:
Stokers isn't really a place for your main meal type thing, it's really just an awesome dessert house for pancakes. Although in my mind it's really a "crepe". Although on everyone else's food blog that has reviewed this little place they've referred to the stuff as "pancakes"
Of course they're not wrong, crepes are pancakes, just very THIN pancakes.. and this is exactly that. a very thin pancake laden with awesome goodness.

I swear if you are a dessert fan, you'd love this place. I am a dessert fan and I know I've fallen in love with it.

So far, everytime I have been I've ordered the strawberry pancake with extra cream and ice-cream. The strawberry on top is fresh, and the inside is laden with more strawberries. The strawberries inside are pretty sour-ish but it works so well with ice-cream and cream AND the pancake itself because the sour taste is then sweetened by the ice-cream, and the pancake acts like the neutralizer and the cream just makes it more fun.

They have OTHER stuff like cinnamon apple pancakes, blueberry pancakes.. but so far, I've only been game enough to try only one.. as shown above. You're probably wondering why I haven't tried the rest.. it's called complacency.. and having a love for strawberries. But next time I'm there, I'll try something different and let you know what I thought about it. But the strawberry one is the awesome of awesomeness

Seriously though, the serving is JUST right, it's not too big, it's not too small. and it always just hits the spot.
OTHER pancake places *cough* pancake parlour*cough* make their pancakes so thick, the portions are over sized and frankly everything taste oh-so -wrong and it just never hits the spot... it fills you up yes, but gives you that sickly feeling of regret. but the great thing is Stokers doesn't, well not for me anyway. It making my mouth water now, thinking about the pancakes there. OMG

My thoughts:
Of course there's not much else for me to say as I've just written most of in the last section above. However, a few things to be noted anyway..
1. It's the weirdest looking place I've ever been to. I know why they open only at night, because it's not the best lighted place in the world. There are a few wooden tables and chairs with a fireplace in the middle. If there was opened during the day, it would take some time for your eyes to adjust.
2. The toilet trip is somewhat creepy, I've been with other friends who have had the same experience, who all say it's creepy. You walk along hallways and you feel so alone, actually it feels like you're in one of those movies such as Hostel and someone's ready to come out with an axe to kill you hahahaha . Everybody gets the chill walking to the toilet. So I say, best not to go if you don't have to, but if you, take someone with you... just in case...
3. I've read other food blogs about this place and everybody's made a point to mention that this place does not serve "alcoholic beverages" which is fine by me. I like the fact that it doesn't. I mean how is it an issue? You're there to socialise, have a good time with your friends and eat awesome pancakes. Just have orange juice for a change.. plus the juice is pretty good too.
4. I've lived in Melbourne all of my life, and I've only discovered Stokers recently and I always feel that I've been robbed, had I known that such a place existed, I would have been there a LONG time ago, and probably frequented Pancake Parlour far less. Lets face it, Pancake Parlour is the equivalence of McDonald's when it comes to pancakes... Stokers is not, it's more refined, it's much better. and Yes, I probably could make the same at home, but that's not the point. Why would I try to copy something fantastic, when someone else does it oh-so-much better, and the plus side is.. I don't have to worry about dishes!

Seriously if you haven't had Stokers dessert, then really you haven't lived properly =] Just kidding.. you're just missing out on good dessert

Cafe Vue: Friday Night at the Movies Review

Location:430 Little Collins St, Melbourne Vic 3000
Phone:(03) 9691 3899

(note: Cafe Vue is part of Vue de Monde.. the oh so great hatted restaurant. Actually it's not part of it per se, it's on the side entrance. You see, there is the main entrance for the rich people, and then they have the side entrance for the poor people where the leftovers are fed. I kid!)

Time: It was about 7pm

Price: Highly unreasonable. $75 per head.. but what do you expect? It's kinda like going to Hermes and buying a keyring for $300 bucks when you know you could get something for the same price without the brand for 100th of the price but you buy it anyway for the "experience" and because you can. and that's why I was there

Cuisine Type: Cafe food

What got dished out:

It was a themed night (Old School movies to be exact... think Charlie Chaplin). I wasn't there for proper food. I knew I was going there for a cocktail night. The biggest mistake anyone does upon going to a cocktail night is to be the designated driver because it means you can't enjoy the alcohol that comes your way without having to worry about "blowing" over. *sigh*

Each drink was themed, linked to some old school movie. Seriously without the waiters giving us an explanation. To me, it would have been any other alcoholic beverage with some food and that was it.. Unfortunately for me. I wasn't really paying attention to much that was being said. (i know i'm a terrible reviewer). So I can't really tell you guys very much the background of the drinks and food as it was explained on the night. although i suspect nobody really cares... (did u get that cafe vue?)

The first thing that came out was Carpaccio of Bambi with pink peppercorns and apple (that was the food), i'd hate to ever think what baby deer taste like as a drink.

The alcoholic beverage was Roundhay Garden. If you're sitting there thinking WTF is a roundhay Garden.. don't worry you are not alone, true to Vue style, everything has to be "different". It's a combination of very NICE congnac. The cognac wasn't so strong. If this was my first ever experience to cognac, i probably would have quickly fallen in love with it, except it wasn't. (it took me some considerable years to even like the alcohol). The most interesting thing about it was it was a mix of champers and cognac. I've never known to mix anything with cognac. I come from the old school thinking that cognac is best drunk un-mixed. To mix it, makes you less of a man. Being that I am 100% female, it really makes no difference right?
Now some wise guy at Vue decided that the best thing to go with this drink (as the primary focus was the alcohol and the food being secondary) was some "bambi", which would probably put some animal loving activist on edge, knowing that it's Bambi that's being eaten.

But have no fear, it's not the chunkiest of deer, (i know what a waste) but it's the thinnest slice of meat known to man. One would think that we're sitting at an Asian restaurant, you know the kind that thinly slice up one prawn into 3 it bits.. just to make it look like there's more than 1 prawn but we all know that it' not the case.
I can't say I was a big fan of this dish. I found it too peppery, and upon writing this, has it occurred to me this was all due to the peppercorns *sigh*. The apples were too sour... Did it work with the drink? actually, to be honest, anything meaty would have worked with the drink. My biggest gripe with the dish? Well it's not that big, it was more or less knowing what to do with it. Pictured as the wooden knife and fork (what's up with that anyway? we're not classy enough for REAL cutlery? going with the poor theme here). Personally I wasn't sure if I was meant to slice it up or roll it up and pick it up with my fingers. It wasn't the best tasting thing I'd ever layed my tongue on. I wouldn't be ordering anything along those lines in a hurry. The drink.. well I'd be drinking it by the litre.

The next thing on the menu was: The Charlie Chaplin. Apparently this was a drink made specifically for Charlie Chaplin once upon a time at some swanky hotel (Waldorf-Astoria) and apparently everybody's been drinking it for years and years and years. Everybody except for me up until my visit at Cafe Vue, clearly I am not cultured enough. This drink itself was meant to have been served with the next meal but alas, with last minute decisions, they decided to move it forward. I cannot say I am a fan of this drink, although I am quite sure this is what inspired the ghastly drink called "Dr. Pepper". Thankfully being Non-American we put up with one less rubbish drink. (funny considering I am am avid fan of coca-cola). The drink comprised of promegranate molasses (wtf is that?), sloe gin (i assumed it was slow gin, and then spent the whole night thinking... how do they make gin go slow) and apricot brandy and lime juice. Yeh that's one hell-of-a-mix only to make it taste so crap. I guess if you are an avid fan of Dr. Pepper this is for you.

What goes well with some alcoholic version of Dr. Pepper? Apparently 'hot dogs and chips". From this photo it looks more like those $3.30 bread rolls that you get from the vietnamese bakery somewhere in Footscray/Springvale/Richmond (pay a little extra and you score some salmonella). Upon tasting it? My first thoughts were "yum" but quickly thought "wtf chicken?" hot dogs are supposed to be pork, not chicken. I'm never a fan of onions but I didn't have a problem with the red onions, it worked well with the chicken. The chips were exactly like the stuff they dish out at McDonald's only fresher, with lots of oil in it, making you regret every bite but not being able to stop because it's
"oh-so-wrong".
What looks just like a cup of tea is actually alcohol in a tea cup. As with the theme, they decided to serve this gin in this cup as in the 1920's it was alcohol was prohibited... My first reaction was "sheesh, did they run out of decent cups" (i know i'm so whacked sometimes.
This was by far the worst drink I had tasted that night. I had palmed my Dr.Pepper to my willing friend, but had I known that this was the next one coming, I would have gladly downed that Dr.Pepper. It was so awful, it was not finished, and apparently they call this 'the Jazz Singer"I was more glad that it was taken from my sight. I don't care that it had some smokey affected taste to it by using smoky tomatoes, it tasted like some whacked out soup that I had conjured up in the kitchen myself. Yup, it tasted just like BAD horrible soup. Thinking about it now gives me shivers.

What apparently goes well with this horrible drink? Confit flathead with ratatouille of course! Seriously, this food dish could hold out on its own without the terrible drink. I just realised that the poor photo taken (sory i'm no photographer) that the ratatouille looks a lot less undesireable (more like a lump of turd). But the ratatouille was abosolutely nice. Mind you, I am no fan of ratatouille, all thanks to that Disney Movie with the same name, every time i think of it, i think of eating mice. I know talk about word association.. or movie associations. The flathead was well cooked, it tasted devine, and not being a fan of fish means that normally within one bite, if not properly cooked, would mean an uneaten dish.

Shamefully this was the one drink I finished up without a second thought. I can't say it was the greatest drink ever. Mainly because I was regretting not finishing off the Roundhay Garden and then having 2 horrible drinks proceeding it. So when something nicer came along, I took up the opportunity to drink the whole thing. They call this the "Rosebud", with some fairy floss (yes, you read correctly) and some reisling. and it was abosolutely.... devine? no.. just average but much nicer than the soup drink. That green thing you see in the photo, i believe was a mint leaf? I can't recall, but i assure you nothing sinister went down... i.e dead insect. I don't think such things can even occur at Vue *scoff*



They served "Caprifeuille goat's cheese with lychees poached in rosewater" to which I was not a big fan of. I've had goat's cheese before but this was just yuck. I know that it's meant to have that rubbery feeling followed by a really strong overbearing cheesiness taste. But the whole rosewater thing really put me off. It even made the lychees tasted oh so weird. I love lychees but I really struggled with this food dish. It was just as bad as the frst fish of bambi. Did it work with the drink? In a way yes... every bite I had of this sparingly served dish made me want to take another gulp of the alcoholic beverage.

The quirkest drink was the dessert drink which was the "Popcorn Madeleine with salt and butter" basically Bourbon infused with popcorn. It tasted very strongly of popcorn and very strongly of bourbon and oddly enough it worked. I loved the quirkiness of it being put in a paper bag, and it took me awhile to work it out. Actually i lie, i didn't work it out, a fellow friend pointed out that popcorn "back in those days" were served in those paper bags. and i was like "oHhhHhhHHhHHh"


As they say 'the best is always saved for the last' and truly, this dessert dish was absolutely awesome. Awesome with a capital A. It was bitter sweet awesomeness. It was "Popcorn Madeline with salt and butter" The sauce was creamy, the madeline (or as i see it, cake piece) was sweet and the bitterness came from the popcorn. Actually i could taste the burnt bits in it. But this dish truly worked well with the drink. Every bite you took from this, with a sip, it just made it an awesome popcorn experience. I finished the dessert but not the drink unfortunately...


My thoughts:

This was my first experience at cafe Vue with the whole cocktail night, I wasn't too sure what to expect. Actually I lie, knowing how Vue operates, I know for a fact that the food was going to small served on oh so large dishes that don't even sell at places like House. Truthfully i found the food and drinks were a hit and miss.
I personally wouldn't go here on my own, I wouldn't take a perspective partner to Cafe Vue to do a cocktail night. To pay $75 is a bit steep.
But of course if you came thinking that the food was going to fill you up etc etc then you've really wasted your time. It's about the experience and about the service.
The service I have to say was exceptionally awesome, the waiters took their time to explain everything and it amazed me about their in depth knowledge about the movies.

Would I do it all over again? Yes provided it's different food and not the whole movie themed night. But i wouldn't be the first one to suggest it.. i would of course agree to tag along to go.