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Friday, March 5, 2010

Cafe Vue: Friday Night at the Movies Review

Location:430 Little Collins St, Melbourne Vic 3000
Phone:(03) 9691 3899

(note: Cafe Vue is part of Vue de Monde.. the oh so great hatted restaurant. Actually it's not part of it per se, it's on the side entrance. You see, there is the main entrance for the rich people, and then they have the side entrance for the poor people where the leftovers are fed. I kid!)

Time: It was about 7pm

Price: Highly unreasonable. $75 per head.. but what do you expect? It's kinda like going to Hermes and buying a keyring for $300 bucks when you know you could get something for the same price without the brand for 100th of the price but you buy it anyway for the "experience" and because you can. and that's why I was there

Cuisine Type: Cafe food

What got dished out:


It was a themed night (Old School movies to be exact... think Charlie Chaplin). I wasn't there for proper food. I knew I was going there for a cocktail night. The biggest mistake anyone does upon going to a cocktail night is to be the designated driver because it means you can't enjoy the alcohol that comes your way without having to worry about "blowing" over. *sigh*

Each drink was themed, linked to some old school movie. Seriously without the waiters giving us an explanation. To me, it would have been any other alcoholic beverage with some food and that was it.. Unfortunately for me. I wasn't really paying attention to much that was being said. (i know i'm a terrible reviewer). So I can't really tell you guys very much the background of the drinks and food as it was explained on the night. although i suspect nobody really cares... (did u get that cafe vue?)

The first thing that came out was Carpaccio of Bambi with pink peppercorns and apple (that was the food), i'd hate to ever think what baby deer taste like as a drink.

The alcoholic beverage was Roundhay Garden. If you're sitting there thinking WTF is a roundhay Garden.. don't worry you are not alone, true to Vue style, everything has to be "different". It's a combination of very NICE congnac. The cognac wasn't so strong. If this was my first ever experience to cognac, i probably would have quickly fallen in love with it, except it wasn't. (it took me some considerable years to even like the alcohol). The most interesting thing about it was it was a mix of champers and cognac. I've never known to mix anything with cognac. I come from the old school thinking that cognac is best drunk un-mixed. To mix it, makes you less of a man. Being that I am 100% female, it really makes no difference right?
Now some wise guy at Vue decided that the best thing to go with this drink (as the primary focus was the alcohol and the food being secondary) was some "bambi", which would probably put some animal loving activist on edge, knowing that it's Bambi that's being eaten.

But have no fear, it's not the chunkiest of deer, (i know what a waste) but it's the thinnest slice of meat known to man. One would think that we're sitting at an Asian restaurant, you know the kind that thinly slice up one prawn into 3 it bits.. just to make it look like there's more than 1 prawn but we all know that it' not the case.
I can't say I was a big fan of this dish. I found it too peppery, and upon writing this, has it occurred to me this was all due to the peppercorns *sigh*. The apples were too sour... Did it work with the drink? actually, to be honest, anything meaty would have worked with the drink. My biggest gripe with the dish? Well it's not that big, it was more or less knowing what to do with it. Pictured as the wooden knife and fork (what's up with that anyway? we're not classy enough for REAL cutlery? going with the poor theme here). Personally I wasn't sure if I was meant to slice it up or roll it up and pick it up with my fingers. It wasn't the best tasting thing I'd ever layed my tongue on. I wouldn't be ordering anything along those lines in a hurry. The drink.. well I'd be drinking it by the litre.

The next thing on the menu was: The Charlie Chaplin. Apparently this was a drink made specifically for Charlie Chaplin once upon a time at some swanky hotel (Waldorf-Astoria) and apparently everybody's been drinking it for years and years and years. Everybody except for me up until my visit at Cafe Vue, clearly I am not cultured enough. This drink itself was meant to have been served with the next meal but alas, with last minute decisions, they decided to move it forward. I cannot say I am a fan of this drink, although I am quite sure this is what inspired the ghastly drink called "Dr. Pepper". Thankfully being Non-American we put up with one less rubbish drink. (funny considering I am am avid fan of coca-cola). The drink comprised of promegranate molasses (wtf is that?), sloe gin (i assumed it was slow gin, and then spent the whole night thinking... how do they make gin go slow) and apricot brandy and lime juice. Yeh that's one hell-of-a-mix only to make it taste so crap. I guess if you are an avid fan of Dr. Pepper this is for you.

What goes well with some alcoholic version of Dr. Pepper? Apparently 'hot dogs and chips". From this photo it looks more like those $3.30 bread rolls that you get from the vietnamese bakery somewhere in Footscray/Springvale/Richmond (pay a little extra and you score some salmonella). Upon tasting it? My first thoughts were "yum" but quickly thought "wtf chicken?" hot dogs are supposed to be pork, not chicken. I'm never a fan of onions but I didn't have a problem with the red onions, it worked well with the chicken. The chips were exactly like the stuff they dish out at McDonald's only fresher, with lots of oil in it, making you regret every bite but not being able to stop because it's
"oh-so-wrong".
What looks just like a cup of tea is actually alcohol in a tea cup. As with the theme, they decided to serve this gin in this cup as in the 1920's it was alcohol was prohibited... My first reaction was "sheesh, did they run out of decent cups" (i know i'm so whacked sometimes.
This was by far the worst drink I had tasted that night. I had palmed my Dr.Pepper to my willing friend, but had I known that this was the next one coming, I would have gladly downed that Dr.Pepper. It was so awful, it was not finished, and apparently they call this 'the Jazz Singer"I was more glad that it was taken from my sight. I don't care that it had some smokey affected taste to it by using smoky tomatoes, it tasted like some whacked out soup that I had conjured up in the kitchen myself. Yup, it tasted just like BAD horrible soup. Thinking about it now gives me shivers.

What apparently goes well with this horrible drink? Confit flathead with ratatouille of course! Seriously, this food dish could hold out on its own without the terrible drink. I just realised that the poor photo taken (sory i'm no photographer) that the ratatouille looks a lot less undesireable (more like a lump of turd). But the ratatouille was abosolutely nice. Mind you, I am no fan of ratatouille, all thanks to that Disney Movie with the same name, every time i think of it, i think of eating mice. I know talk about word association.. or movie associations. The flathead was well cooked, it tasted devine, and not being a fan of fish means that normally within one bite, if not properly cooked, would mean an uneaten dish.

Shamefully this was the one drink I finished up without a second thought. I can't say it was the greatest drink ever. Mainly because I was regretting not finishing off the Roundhay Garden and then having 2 horrible drinks proceeding it. So when something nicer came along, I took up the opportunity to drink the whole thing. They call this the "Rosebud", with some fairy floss (yes, you read correctly) and some reisling. and it was abosolutely.... devine? no.. just average but much nicer than the soup drink. That green thing you see in the photo, i believe was a mint leaf? I can't recall, but i assure you nothing sinister went down... i.e dead insect. I don't think such things can even occur at Vue *scoff*



They served "Caprifeuille goat's cheese with lychees poached in rosewater" to which I was not a big fan of. I've had goat's cheese before but this was just yuck. I know that it's meant to have that rubbery feeling followed by a really strong overbearing cheesiness taste. But the whole rosewater thing really put me off. It even made the lychees tasted oh so weird. I love lychees but I really struggled with this food dish. It was just as bad as the frst fish of bambi. Did it work with the drink? In a way yes... every bite I had of this sparingly served dish made me want to take another gulp of the alcoholic beverage.

The quirkest drink was the dessert drink which was the "Popcorn Madeleine with salt and butter" basically Bourbon infused with popcorn. It tasted very strongly of popcorn and very strongly of bourbon and oddly enough it worked. I loved the quirkiness of it being put in a paper bag, and it took me awhile to work it out. Actually i lie, i didn't work it out, a fellow friend pointed out that popcorn "back in those days" were served in those paper bags. and i was like "oHhhHhhHHhHHh"


As they say 'the best is always saved for the last' and truly, this dessert dish was absolutely awesome. Awesome with a capital A. It was bitter sweet awesomeness. It was "Popcorn Madeline with salt and butter" The sauce was creamy, the madeline (or as i see it, cake piece) was sweet and the bitterness came from the popcorn. Actually i could taste the burnt bits in it. But this dish truly worked well with the drink. Every bite you took from this, with a sip, it just made it an awesome popcorn experience. I finished the dessert but not the drink unfortunately...


My thoughts:

This was my first experience at cafe Vue with the whole cocktail night, I wasn't too sure what to expect. Actually I lie, knowing how Vue operates, I know for a fact that the food was going to small served on oh so large dishes that don't even sell at places like House. Truthfully i found the food and drinks were a hit and miss.
I personally wouldn't go here on my own, I wouldn't take a perspective partner to Cafe Vue to do a cocktail night. To pay $75 is a bit steep.
But of course if you came thinking that the food was going to fill you up etc etc then you've really wasted your time. It's about the experience and about the service.
The service I have to say was exceptionally awesome, the waiters took their time to explain everything and it amazed me about their in depth knowledge about the movies.

Would I do it all over again? Yes provided it's different food and not the whole movie themed night. But i wouldn't be the first one to suggest it.. i would of course agree to tag along to go.

Café Vue on Urbanspoon

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Great review, only I'm a little confused : all in all it seems like you didnt like it. Yet urban spoon shows your review as a like ?
In your words WTF ?

Anonymous said...

"Price: Highly unreasonable. $75 per head..."

Again WTF? From your description you get 5 courses that's five cocktails with food pairing, seems pretty reasonable to me??

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